After a few months in hospital I was finally allowed out for a day trip to go and see my horses with my parents. I had been looking forward to this day for so long and was just buzzing. I had spoken to the nurses and told them that I needed to be up, washed and ready to go by 7am. They were shocked and it was hard work after months of not needing to be up ready for anything, except ward round.
The day we had planned was going to watch Echo show jumping at Bicton Arena. I had been missing Echo so much and all I wanted to do was give her a big kiss but I didn’t know how she was going to react to the wheelchair. Unfortunately, the day was slightly overshadowed with the fact that this was the first time travelling in a car since the accident and I was suffering with severe anxiety about it. I kept imagining other cars driving straight into us, when cars were overtaking it would make me jump I just hated every minute of it but it had to be done.
When we got to Bicton we immediately went to find Echo. She was stabled not too far away from the arenas and thankfully the organisers were kind enough to let us drive as close as we could, I’m sure you can imagine stones and mud aren’t a great combination in a wheelchair so my dad had to help me all the time.
All the emotions of the day came out in one, when I finally got to give Echo a cuddle and kiss, it makes me tear up now remembering how I felt. I was drained after the journey, felt so lucky that I was here able to do this but so sad that I would never be able to event her again. Echo performed great that day, jumping some big tracks and looking amazing, I was so happy that she was still doing what she loved.
On the way back we did a slight detour back home to see the other horses but also just for me to have a little longer away from hospital. I couldn’t believe how difficult it was to move around the house I was brought up in, everything was awkward and so frustrating. When you’re in hospital everything is designed for a wheelchair, electric doors, smooth hallways, accessible toilets you forget what ‘normal’ life is like. My parents helped me around and got me onto the sofa so I could rest my body and put my very swollen feet up. This is when I had the biggest cuddle from our dog Willow who I hadn’t seen in months and even managed a little nap with her. God, I had missed being at home! I knew I needed to crack on and get discharged from hospital as soon as possible, I was becoming too comfortable with how easy it is in there and living in a bubble.
So, my target was set.